What can parents say to their children before they go on stage? | Parent Chat Room

Parents are often more nervous than their children when their children are preparing to participate in a performance or competition.

"Remember what your teacher taught you."
"Don't play the wrong notes."
"I need to do my best this time."

These words are meant to express concern, but for a child who is already a little nervous, they might turn into a different kind of pressure: "I have to do well."

So, in the last few minutes before going on stage, should parents remind each parent of every detail again?

not necessarily.

Less reminders, more peace of mind before going on stage.

If a child has already prepared for a period of time and received guidance from a teacher, repeatedly reminding them of rhythm, posture, expression, or "don't make mistakes" before going on stage may not necessarily help them perform better.

Instead, parents can try to shift their focus from the "result" back to the "present moment".

4 sentences that can be used directly

① "Take your time, go on stage when you're ready."

This statement doesn't demand that the child perform exceptionally well; it simply tells him not to rush.

If your child is visibly nervous, you can help them take a deep breath and then refocus their attention on the upcoming performance.

②"Remember to enjoy the music you've been preparing for so long."

Children spend a lot of time practicing, and in the end, all that's left is "not making mistakes."

Reminding children to listen to the music they are playing and to feel the stage is also a good way to prepare.

③ "You don't need to be perfect, just focus on doing what you want to do."

Of course, there will be scores and results when participating in a competition, but you can still focus on your performance during those few minutes on stage.

This is especially important for some children who are very afraid of making mistakes.

④ "No matter the outcome, I look forward to seeing your performance."

This statement shifts the focus back from rankings to the child himself.

For children, "Mom and Dad are looking forward to my performance" and "Mom and Dad are looking forward to my ranking" are two very different feelings.

Not every child needs the same kind of encouragement.

Of course, every child has a different personality.

Some children like their parents to remind them again before they go on stage, while others prefer to be quiet; some children will proactively say that they are very nervous, while others don't want to talk about the competition at all.

Therefore, the key is not necessarily to find the "most correct" statement, but to first see what the child truly needs at that moment.

If the child is currently...	Parents can give it a try...
He kept saying he was very nervous.	"It's normal to be nervous, I'll be there for you."
I kept worrying that I would play the wrong note	"Don't overthink it, just focus on the first note."
He looked excited and looking forward to it.	Go enjoy your stage!
I don't want to talk about acting anymore.	Give him some space; you don't necessarily have to keep pressing him.

More than demanding "perform well," children need to know "I believe in you."

Participating in a performance or competition is itself a process of accumulating experience.

Children may be nervous, may make small mistakes, or may have a moment that makes them very happy.

What parents can do is not only accompany their children in preparing for the competition, but also let them know that no matter how they perform today, there will always be people supporting them from the audience.

The next time your child is about to go on stage, try saying less "Don't make a mistake" and more:

Sometimes, what children need most is a simple and sincere word of support.